Thursday, October 17, 2013

Chinese Food by Alison Gold, my reaction

There is really not enough words in the English language to describe how awful I think this song is.  But before I get to that, sorry for not posting in a while.  For the 6 people in the world that's reading this I have been trying to save money to buy a house so not as much going out to dinner I'm afraid.  But I still want to share my brand of food criticism with everyone.  Hopeful it brings a smile to your face or save you some money if your deciding where to eat.  So without further delay I present to you...Chinese Food and my reaction.


0:06-0:15 Chinese translation "we are going to make some pancakes, maybe add some eggs.  Wait, did I lock my door when I left the house this morning?  oh lets add some milk, 500 cubic centimeters should be enough, wait where's my cup, never mind, I'll just add as much as I want"  WTF?? He is obviously frying noodles!!



0:17 After "balling"?  "bawling"?...

0:18 Clubbing for a 14 year old?  really? can we say KE$HA in training bra?

0:25-0:30 and I'm walking, and I'm swaying my arm, and I'm looking at the camera, and I'm wearing some clothes, and I'm kicking, and I'm describing, everything I do, and I'm getting gettting getting gettting grumpy...

0:33 Chow "hi, how are you doing", Alison Gold "Sorry i wasn't talking to you".

0:39 I'm so high right now



0:46 Aren't there child labor laws in this state?

0:58 make it rain.  "When you're in da club with a stack, and you throw the money up in the air at the strippers. The effect is that it seems to be raining money." urban dictionary:-) 

1:08 What rhymes with broccoli? see 1:21

1:21 Chicken Wing?



1:25 Sometime there's so much beauty in the world

1:41 No you won't.  All your friends will disavow any knowledge of you.


1:43 Pedo Panda!!


1:48-2:05 OMG this is so creepy.  or am I creepy for implying... nope still creepy



2:10 Alison, this is your quest, you must find the grail



2:14 OK what i said about creepy before, its definitely more creepy now.

2:17 what rhymes with Chinese food?  well wonton soup of course.  Shakespear this is not!

2:21 Well at least Monopoly actually rhymes with broccoli

2:24 Please do not tell me what your fantasy is while holding monopoly money and surrounded by a bunch of 14 year old girls.



2:32 Pot sticks?

2:44-2:59 OK that's it now it's official, this music video is offensive to Chinese people and food in general




3:07 I'm Chris Hansen, and tonight on to catch a predator...

3:10 We have a man that likes to dress up as a panda and offer little girls Chinese food...

3:20 Yes, and you will feel hungry for Chinese food after watching this video...


Thursday, August 8, 2013

Brick American Eatery, Save Your Money and go to Olive Garden

Let me start off by saying that I was kind of weary of the restaurant when we went.  $120 worth of food for 60 bucks Groupon seemed like a good deal but I have to say this place is definitely not worth the price of admission Groupon or not.  

We arrived at dinner about 7, which was just when their happy hour ended.  However our server was nice enough to put one more round of drinks in for us, which we all appreciated.  This was a nice gesture which I think all restaurant should follow, however with that our dinner went down hill.  For the remainder of the evening, the service was slow and no one came to refill our waters despite the dining room not being too crowded.



Our appetizers, muscles in white wine sauce, and cheeseburger spring rolls, were nothing special.  The muscles had almost no flavor even when you got to the sauce on the bottom, this could be good if you are looking for something light, but I personally prefer some heavier seasoning.  The spring rolls were fried to perfection and the arugula salad was well composed with the right amount of natural bitterness and vinaigrette, however the filling for the spring rolls was ground beef with cheese, that's it.  Some more seasoning here would again have been nice.  The red sauce was a spicy ketchup concoction which was OK but again nothing special. 


For our mains, we had 3 pasta dishes and the blackened salmon special.  My wife ordered the gnocchi in basil pesto sauce (green), and our friends ordered the gnocchi in vodka sauce and spaghetti and meatballs.  With the lack luster appetizer round my expectations were not very high and on that Brick definitely delivered.  I usually like my pesto to have a very strong basil taste but in this case i would not have guessed there was any basil in it unless someone told me.  The vodka sauce was just as bland, more tomatoey than any other flavor.


In addition the two different gnocchis had very different textures, my wife's being kind of doughy and my friend's being more firm.  I suspect that this is because they used one bag up and opened another for the second order.  Otherwise you'd expect two pasta dishes to have similar texture if they were cooked at the same time.  However we all agreed that for the price, they should have thrown in some protein or something, just eating a plate of pasta gets a little boring even if it is superb. Oh and the spaghetti and meatballs was good, but again nothing special that I would order again.


I think the only dish of the night that had some flavor was my entree, which was a blacken salmon severed over mashed potatoes infused with grilled peppers.  The fish was cooked nicely with a crispy skin on the bottom and a nice cajun spicy mix blackened, not too heavy, not too light.  The mashed potatoes it self was also very good.  The addition of the spicy grilled peppers gave it a slight kick which really livened up the plate.  the tomato salsa on top was also a great addition but I feel like a little more acidity to balance the starch would have worked better.  All in all though it was a well composed dish.


 We were too full after everything to get dessert but based on the meal itself I'd say I did not care to see the dessert menu and my companions agreed.  But before my final verdict there is something you should be aware of when you use a groupon.  And that is once the bill comes you better have a PHD mathematician at the table to figure out how much each person owes, seriously we must have spent at least 30 minutes just trying to do that, and at our table we had 2 business owners, an accountant, and an engineer:-)  In the end, from the undiscounted total of $174+tip-groupon deal+what we owe to the person who brought the groupon-drinks....(30 minutes later), each of us owe about $27/person for 5 people including tip, $34.80/person no tip, undiscounted.

This is a bargain you say, and I'd agree, but consider this: I could have had fried calamari $8.99+ herb grilled salmon $17.97 at Olive Garden for $26.95+$8 drink = $34.95, which I would argue is a far better value/taste because with Olive Garden you at least get bread sticks and soup or salad with your entree.  Or consider this, I could have had a pot of muscles and fries with a nice beer at Monks 3 blocks away for $18 bucks.

So, where are we then with Brick?  Well, with all the other great restaurants in town just a few blocks away.  I'd say this place is only worth visiting if you have a groupon and if you have no tastebuds.  This restaurant get a 6/10.  The inconsistent food, lack of flavor and overall unimaginativeness of the menu guarantees that this Brick will sink to the bottom in no time.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Lunch: Takumi

This is a quickie review of one of my favorite lunch spots in Wilmington, DE.  This is definitely worth you checking out if you like Chinese food.  But Bo you say, Takumi is a "Japanese sounding place".  Well your right, they do have a full sushi bar, but I have to say their Chinese food is much better for lunch.  having tried all the local spots for bento boxes, I can honestly say that for the price, you can get a bento box in other places, but I digress. 


 In the photos shown my friend and I had the pork belly with pickle (top) and the pork with garlic sauce (bottom).  The porkbelly was nice and tender with the fat falling apart as you tried to pick it up with your chopsticks.  The flavor was a well balanced combination of sweet and savory.  It is heavy but since there's not that many pieces, about 6 or so, you don't feel too bad for indulging.


The pork with garlic sauce was labeled to be spicy on the menu but it was fairly mild.  Compared to some of the other dishes they have that are also labeled as spicy I have to say be careful they are not all equally spicy.  The Chicken with Pepper for example is very spicy for most tastes.  The pork was nice and tender and the dish had a strong fruitiness and tartness that was very complementary of each other and the crisp celery and bamboo shoots.

At about $9.95/person before tip, this is a really good place for lunch if your in the Wilmington DE area.  Taste is great, price is reasonable, all in all I'd say i'd give this place a 8/10.  Till next time, eat well my friends.

Monday, August 5, 2013

Sweetwater Tavern

Hello folks,

I have a rule when it comes to dining.  And that rule is to never eat at a chain restaurant for dinner.  Now I know from my last week's review I did go to a Ruth Chris, which is technically a chain place but I think any reasonable person would not confuse a chain like Ruth Chris with say Applebees'.  OK disclaimer out of the way, let get to what makes this restaurant, Sweetwater tavern in falls church special.

In one word?  Free!! well my brother in law and family paid for it so it was free for me.  Other than that the food was very unremarkable.  Except... du du de dum, the wings.  They were so good in fact that I didn't even get to take a picture.  Not sure what was in the "puddle sauce" but the wings were juicy, and smoky, with just a little bit of spiciness to give it that kick that sent it out of the park.  My wife even remarked that they were the best wings she ever had, to which I agreed.  They were probably the best wings "she" ever had.  But all kidding aside, they managed to get the smoky, spicy goodness into the meat itself and not just on the skin which to me is the mark of a delicious wing.  Sorry no picture, seriously the wings flew off the plate before I could get my camera out.

Along with our wings we also had some bruschetta which were served with toasted garlic bread.  The bruschetta was very well seasoned with the right amount of vinegar and olive oil, a nice counter balance to the smoky richness of the wings.  Our drinks were also very tasty, with the mango martini being my favorite between the pomegranate margarita and their red sangria.

With our appetizers gone in a matter of seconds my somewhat cynical side was starting to let its guard down.  Mmm maybe I finally found a good american restaurant?  Maybe after all this time I've been too picky and let some real gems escape my attention?  Or maybe pigs can fly!!

My 12 ouch prime rib arrived barely above room temperature with no au ju or horse radish.  To me the horse radish I can forgive but the steak being cold is definitely a cardinal sin right up there with using the same sauce for an appetizer and an entree.  To be fair the stake was cook to medium like I ordered but without the right accompaniment it definitely suffered in my book.

The rest of our meal was well liked by the aforementioned brother in law and family.  My sister in law had the burger, and my mother in law had the fillet.  shown here.



They looked pretty good but I can't judge since I did not get to taste any.  But at least they look good:-)  My brother in law had the drunken ribeye and a loaded baked potato which he also enjoyed.  


I did get a taste of my wife's Jambalaya pasta which you can tell was not made in house, but the sauce was actually pretty good.  It had a nice spice level which I did not expect, not because I don't know what jambalaya is but rather because in this type of restaurant I expected it to be some what watered down.  So pasta dish was a win despite itself.


Over all the meal was satisfactory.  Aside from the somewhat minor flaws I found with my dish and the "non home made" pasta, I'd say it is a relatively good value for your dollar.  Our meal for a family of 5 was about $26/person before tip.  Would I go back there again?  Probably not, but the company and the 3 fire alarms definitely made it a memorable.  Yeah the fire alarm went off 3 times during the meal, and according to our server, someone kept "accidentally" pulling it in the basement.  Seriously?  3 times?  Eventually they just disabled the sound while the fire department went to check it out.

Anyway, I think I'd give this place a 6/10 based on the whole experience.  It's not a bad place per say but for 26/person I know I can get a better meal in many other places.  Ok folks till next time, keep eating well and remember, don't settle for less with it comes to what goes in your stomach.

Monday, July 29, 2013

Ruth Chris Philadelphia, Steak done right.

I love steak.  Weather it be at a back yard bbq or at a fancy steak house, steak is by far my favorite self contained meal.  What I mean is that usually an 8 ounce fillet could be all you eat and you'd be satisfied, however when paired with the right wine and right appetizer, it can turn a good meal into a phenomenal one.  

Such was the case at Ruth Chris' in center city Philadelphia.  Situated 23 ft away from the Academy of Music (check google maps), the restaurant had a great atmosphere with 2 separate dining areas one which had a large window to the left of the hostess and a more secluded but larger one directly behind the entrance.


For appetizers we had the Crabtini, and Calimari.  The lump crabs in the crabtini were about an inch long and half inch wide.  I don't think I've ever had lump crab me that large.  The vinaigrette was nice and refreshing with a some Dijon mustard and some green and red peppers and some coleslaw.  I found the lemon was not necessary for this dish since the vinaigrette already had some tartness to it, but all in all was the perfect start to my meal.  


When my wife's appetizer came out I was amazed by the portion.  as you can see from the photo there was probably a pound of calamari on that plate.  To me this was too much.  I understand that the price is relatively high but I have to say compared to the crab dish, this dish could have benefited from the philosophy that less is more.  Being a fried dish, it could have used some more fresh elements on the dish to cut the greasiness.  The sweet and sour Thai chili sauce was a little over powering but the dish itself was a little too much.  A good appetizer to share but nothing special.


But enough about the appetizers.  What about the main attraction, what about the steaks!!??  Well in one word my fillet was perfect.  The steaks are served on a sizzling plate that was baked to 500 degrees.  I think the idea is that if you think your steak is not well cooked enough you can basically give it another quick sear on your plate.  Unfortunately the plate doesn't stay hot for that long but I'd say at least for half of my meal.  The taste of the steak was juicy, tender, and with just a little bit of salt and pepper which is all you need for a steak of this caliber.  Even as the plate cooled and the steak cooled, I did not get a sense that I was chewing raw meat which I've had that feeling when I've ordered medium rare at other high end steak houses.  To me my steak was perfect.    


My wife had similar compliments about her NY strip which she also ordered medium rare.  Now being a tougher cut of meat you can taste the difference in texture immediately.  Here again the portion was huge.  about 2x thicker than your typical NY strip you'd buy at the grocery store.  I personally preferred the juiciness and tenderness of the fillet but the strip was also probably the best strip I ever had.  


Now one thing to be mindful when you go to a place like this is that, the a la carte sides are meant to be shared.  Since we had each gotten an appetizer, we only got the sauteed spinach as the side.  The spinach was not too overdone, and most likely it was cooked in steak drippings which made the whole thing as unhealthy as possible.  But who cares it was damned good.  


My wife and I have had "fancy steak" about once a year in the last few years, and of all the ones in Philly, Del Frisco, Smith and Wolensky, Barkley Prime, I have to say this is the best steak I've ever had among all those great restaurants.  I think the only thing the restaurant can improve on would be to resize some of their appetizers so that they are not too over whelming.  The steak must always be the star attraction here.  So based on my experience, I give Ruth Chris' Philadelphia a finger licking 9/10.  If you are looking for a great steak house you haven't been to Ruth Chris' run, don't walk.  You will definitely not regret it.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Funny Engrish Restaurant Offerings in India

I think these speak for them selves.  Most of these are courtesy of buzzfeed.

1. Houston we have a problem


2.  There's no part of that menu item I don't like

3. Stay away!  These guys are testy.  Nom Nom Nom,


4. We must go back to the past to enjoy food of the future!!


5. Mother Beeping chicken


5. Nothing like a big mouth full of cock with your biriyani


6. WEEEE wiskeeeeee!!


7. I want to goto there


Just Say NO to organic!!!

Hello fellow foodies

Now I know I might get some strong reaction out of certain people who swears by it but organic foods simply isn't any more nutritious nor is it any better for society as a whole.
 

According to this recent article in Forbes, which sites various studies as well as interviews, not only are claims of higher nutritional value not based on any science, but because in order to be considered "organically" grown, highly effective man made pesticides and herbicides can not be used, organic foods have lower yield and require more human effort to maintain and therefore cost more.

So why do people do it?  Well one explanation is that eating organic is more of a philosophy and people who adhere to it would rather believe the myth that they are doing something healthy for their body.  The other explanation is what I like to call "first world" problems.  In the heart of Africa where large portion of the population are engaged in backbreaking labor to subsistence farm I guarantee you they would welcome modern farming technology that would allow them to get 30% more yield in their crop.

So the next time your health contentious and "socially responsible" friends want to feel smug because they paid 8 dollars for an organically grown tomato while yours cost 4 bucks for 5.  Just remember you are better than they are.  And the next time you have the option to shop at a place where they shove "organically" grown crap in your face as part of their marketing ploy to get you to spend more money, just remember, you are way way smarter than that.  In short, just say NO to organic!!!